Thursday, July 22, 2010

Fragments from last year

Found this in last year's notebook, which I just dug up.  Pretty accurate almost a year later.

If only I could make the bath hot enough,
I could open my pores wide enough to expel
all that is not me: a full-body
exorcism.
*
I would like to open the world for one day,
for all people to be as they are, and not
as the world has made them;
to drink the bleak confusion like a cocktail,
and see the deepest selves,
exposing both the crackling blacks
and the serene brightnesses in our souls -
each one a gem to be coveted.
*
It smells like shame, this trying
to be what we are not, this need to adapt
to what we know will make others love us.
This is not truth.
*
I could be beautiful if only I could sweat out
all the common,
burn down to a diamond core,
all light and saturation and rich,
decadent shadow.
But I am a pebble in a sea of pebbles,
gazing at stars.